back to malaysia

hey fellas.

here i am, back to my not-so-called-home, malaysia.

you know what it felt to be me, today?

it was like, for the first time, stepping on Malaysia.

I flew with Garuda Indonesia, therefore I landed on KLIA, not LCCT (I used to land here, if I use AirAsia).

and to be honest, I miss him.

It was still crystal clear when he picked me up at KLIA, six months ago.

Back then, I walked as fast as I can. I still remember how my heart beat up waiting for his calls (since my number could not be used anymore). I still remember how I was stupid, waiting on wrong line when I claimed on my baggage. I still remember how he lied he was still on his way to airport. I still remember how he hugged me from my back (I didn't see him). I still remember how he held my hand when we were searching for our car. I still remember what happened, exactly.

But today, I was alone. together with those TKIs.

I was totally alone. I knew no one.

I was (and am) scared.

I was scared I was gonna remember you, again.

I was successful forgetting my feelings back in hometown.

but what happened? I remember you. :(

hey, you succeed moving on! you can do it here! :)

and today was not-so-good-day.

gue lupa beli majalah buat bacaan di malay.

jadilah gue beli di bandara.

ternyata harga majalahnya lebih mahal 2x lipat!

dasar konde!

Isn't it pathetic?

i accidentally got this from my Facebook.

Well, i barely open my FB account because I am just... scared.

Maybe I am scared because I'm not ready to get out my comfort zone.

After two days without FB (it is rare case, dear. because I AM a facebooker), finally I am online, again.

At first, I didn't want to open it, but I was curious.

and there you go. I spotted it in my Home.

and suddenly, all the walls that I have built break down.

suddenly, i feel i am pathetic.

We even haven't said "Happy 1st Anniversary, Sayang..."

But in a matter of fact, it's done.

No matter how hard I tried, it's done.

I don't want to, but I have to move on.

As I said, no matter how hard you work it out, LDR won't EVER work.

trust me. I underwent twice and NOTHING worked.

it pisses me off, but what can I do?

and the next question is when am i going to change my relationship status?

decision!

HELL YEAH.
i just made one of the biggest decision in my life.
well, this decision should have been taken months ago but i just did not have courage to do that, anyway.
*besides, actually i was forced to take this decision.

so far, it went well.
no great wound occurred.
no complication either.
it went well.
but i don't know what's gonna happen once i'll be back to Malaysia.
is the wound really disappeared.
or is it just closed temporarily by a bandage?
i hope there's no severe wound anyway.
i am sick of this.
i wanna live normally!
i don't wanna live with this illness!

well, my family helps me so much to go through this illness.
my bestfriends too.
they ARE freakishly amazing!
who predicts i could be healed this fast?
even, nobody realizes it, don't they?
nobody realizes coz i hide it well.
hahaha. because i am a good actress.
i should win an award. really. :)
but one person i should give thanks the most is my GOD.
Jesus is the one who lifts up my burdens, covers my wound, and heals my illness!

i really wanna live normally, like the others do.
because i feel like i'm crap. i'm a little weak girl who can do nothing.
:(

holiday?

One and half week has been passed.

I've been in holiday and this is why sometimes I hate holidays.

Well, I don't say I love school anyway.

tapi gue lebih suka sibuk dari pada bengong, nggak ada kerjaan kaya gini.

this is killing me.

karena gue gak ada kerjaan dan tidak ada yang gue pikirin, jadilah gue selalu memikirkan hal-hal yang tidak perlu dipikirkan.

and i hate this.

gue jadi nggak tenang.

gue jadi nggak bisa menikmat liburan.

OMG!!!!!

#abaikan saja post ini.

This is my story

www.this-is-my-story.com/v/XUBT4H5I9K1N

GUE EMANG NGGAK PERNAH BISA MOVE ON DARI ELO SEMUA!!

KENAPA EMANGNYA KALO GUE GAK BISA MOVE ON?

GUE FREAK?

IYAAAA???????????

hey hey, follow my boyf's cooking blog! :D

http://nickycookingadventure.blogspot.com/

cooking talent

my boyf has now become a cooking freak.

he likes to cook. he buys anything, such as

with-something-something sauce, beach-hat-alike mushrooms, what else? he watches cooking videos on youtube. he adores a cooking movie titled "julie & julia". and at the moment, he's writing a cooking blog.

well, i admit i can't cook.

my mother is an unbelievably natural chef.

my dad, even though there are only scrambled egg and omelette written in his cooking dictionary, but he cooks the best omelette i've ever tasted!

my brother? don't include him. he just likes to eat. anything.

and now, my boyf likes the same thing. cooking.

what happens to people around me, huh?

it's like everybody has special talent of cooking.

me?

i once cooked simple cornet beef fried rice.

i was like, 'c'mon nad. this is just simple fried rice. it's like everyone can cook. why can't you?'

and i started with a stupid accident.

i bought a can of cornet beef. the thing was, i did not know how to open it.

well yes, there was a can opener attached to the can, but i had no power to open it.

after 30 minutes attempting to crack the can, i gave up. i let my housemate do it.

but what happened next? she broke the can opener.

well, apparently that was my fault. hehe.

so, i spent about one hour trying to bang-bang the can with anything i could use.

finally, the can was cracked and the shape of the can was like, indescribable.

haha.

and what happened next was, I fried the egg.

but, i stupidly put insufficient butter on the pan, resulting the egg was sticked to the surface of the pan. *sigh.

i threw out the cooked egg and started with the new egg.

second attempt went well.

anyway, i was proud of my fried rice. i gave a small portion for my friend and she said, "this tastes good!"

:)

and the following day, since i have encouraged myself 'everyone can cook', i tried to cook another recipe.

"sawi tumis".

and that tumis tasted VERY VERY SALTY.

and yeah, i stopped cooking after that.

i like cooking. but it seems like i have no gift in cooking. hahaah.. :D

maybe i'll create another blog about travelling.

someday.

and i'll start with my journey in Malaysia.

and...

my boyf wants to contribute in this-coming-blog, perhaps? ;)

*he likes to travel too. a lot.

whole gank

i miss them. damn much. yes. that much, till I couldn't handle it anymore.

God, can I just turn back the time, when I could feel this happiness?

deferred exam

Hey folks, I'm back with good and bad news.

good news:

I AM FREE. yeah, actually, particularly free.

this good news led to bad news.

bad news:

i got sick when sitting for my last paper.

Well, it wasn't that crucial if i could stand the pain.

but unfortunately, i couldn't.

I decided to take deferred exam.

*sigh.

that's why i am particularly free.

and, HOLIDAY IS COMING!

start with Sherli's visit!

and i'll be back home on 17th!